


Dude-sized

by The_silent_smile



Series: The not so bad life of the Avengers AKA the few times I wrote fluff [9]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Awesome Sam Wilson, Blood and Injury, Bucky Barnes & Sam Wilson Friendship, Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Is a Good Bro, Bucky Barnes's Metal Arm, Captain America Sam Wilson, Don't worry, Fluff and Crack, Fluff and Humor, Frenemies Bucky Barnes & Sam Wilson, Light Angst, Light-Hearted, Old Steve Rogers, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Sam Wilson Is a Good Bro, Sam Wilson is a Gift, Steve Rogers is Not Captain America, httyd refrence, it's all good though, light injury
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-19
Updated: 2019-06-19
Packaged: 2020-05-14 22:15:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,963
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19282258
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_silent_smile/pseuds/The_silent_smile
Summary: Bucky and Sam are impossible, Steve is paid a visit and Bucky should buy bigger blankets.(Inspired by Anthony Mackie ranting about Sebastian's couch even though he's never been to his house and Sebastian doesn't have those kinds of blankets, and my friend being desperate for some SamBucky content.





	Dude-sized

**Author's Note:**

> This can be romantic if you squint. If not then it's just them being the absolute crackheads that they usually are when in each others company.

"Barnes I swear to God if you don't throw me the shield in ten seconds-"  
"You had it for like five minutes calm the fuck down birdbrains!"  
"Steve gave it to me, asshole!"

The bickering that was going on wildly confused the two only Hydra agents still standing as what only could be described as an American treasure was thrown across the 'battlefield' - that currently consisted out of the parking lot of a McDonald's and a part of the drive-thru lane- like an overgrown frisbee. Magically bouncing of off surfaces that it should have to smack into while knocking out goons left and right.

The two Hydra agents that were left were quickly eliminated by a well-placed throw of the shield which, after the two were out cold was flying back to Bucky's arm before stopping mid-air, seemingly hovering there like the rip-off version of a UFO.

"Turn of those damn magnets shitface."  
"Do it yourself, Hiccup ripoff!"  
"Who the hell is Hiccup?"  
"Of course grandpa hasn't watched 'How to train your dragon', why am I surprised?"

The two superheroes continued to bicker, both of their forearms lit up by the electromagnets desperately trying to pull the shield towards them as Sam was now trying to explain his insult to Bucky, all the while the two of them were kneedeep in unconscious Hydra agents.

"-No but he has a prosthetic leg and because you have a-"  
"Honestly forget it, Sam, let's just go get whatever weapon they tried to make, blow it to hell and then go home so I can recover the brain cells I lost while spending time with you."  
"I'm perplexed. I honestly didn't think you had any brain cells."  
"I hate you."

\- 

The weapon Hydra had been trying to make seemed to be vaguely based on the giant worms that had infiltrated New York all those years ago, these being significantly smaller and malfunctioning constantly, though dangerous none the less.

They quit their banter from the moment that they saw the robotic creatures up until walking out of the McDonalds (Turns out a fast food restaurant is a perfect place to build an underground Nazi camp under,) the things having brought back less than pleasant memories of their last encounter with them and the things that were sacrificed in that battle.

Though once slight nausea that had been caused by seeing them had passed, it made Sam think of Steve and how he hadn't visited his old (ha! understatement of the century,) friend this week yet.

"Ey winter, you prepared to sacrifice some more brain cells for me? Thought it'd be nice if we went and visited Steve together this time. Yaknow, talking shit about each other to him is way less fun when the other doesn't actually hear it."

Bucky rolled his eyes at that, though the fond look that crossed his face and the small nod gave Sam enough to let him know that Bucky was alright and fine with the idea.  
Visiting Steve had become something personal to them both, the man now happy and content with spending his final days in a nursing home of his choice, the knowing glint in his eyes and the smile of a man who had a life full of hardship but a lifetime full of happiness behind him always greeting them whenever they came over. 

Them sharing stories about the mission and what it was like to be recognised in the streets by kids who were too young to know about the man that wore the shield before them, Steve smiling and listening before telling them about his own life. About how Esmee and he had screwed with the bingo game again so that all of the little orbs that rolled out of the spinning wheel would be numbers they had on their cards. About how he always got given an extra slice of cake which he always refused.

They'd always gone alone though. Because that time was private and special to them.

But things change sometimes.

"Sam and James, here to see Steve Rogers."  
"The good captain must be excited to see you both together for once, you usually avoid each other like the plague."  
"You've got no idea m' am. Come on Sam, let's go."

-

The talk with Steve was pleasant, if not a little strained.

"I'm glad you both decided to come together this time. It's easier explaining this in one go." Steve said, pure blue eyes looking at them both before he fumbled, trying to get something out of his pocket.

Once he straightened his back again, he had a small envelope in his hand, skin worn from days in the sun and dancing in the rain. From sitting too close by the fireplace and planting a new tree in their garden.

The envelope was given to Bucky who, after giving Steve a questioning look and motioning for Sam to get closer, opened it carefully and took out the two pieces of paper contained within.  
Before he could unfold them though, Steves hand, the ring ticking against Bucky's vibranium wrist as he wrapped his fingers around it, motioned for him to put it down again.

"It's my will."  
"Steve..."  
"Plus some instructions for who the invite to my funeral and such."

The two men in front of him looked as if their favourite toy had been taken away, Steve just smiling warmly though with a hint of sadness in his eyes as he waited patiently for them to say anything. As the seconds ticked by and it became clear that they weren't going to, he let out a sigh and tried to explain instead.

"I'm getting old guys. I am old. And I thought I'd rather give this to you when I'm still perfectly healthy so you'll know what to do when I'm not. Don't worry, nothing is wrong or will be in quite some time I think, the healing factor is still kicking as you might be able to tell, but this needs to be discussed."

"I know Stevie. We know."

Steve gave them both a warm smile again, nodding once before they moved on to their normal, more mundane topics, Steve complaining about them bickering like a married couple, Sam and Bucky both arguing and telling Steve that; yes, Astrid from down the hall is an asshole for stealing his favourite mug and claiming it as her own, the topic of Steve's will, nearly forgotten once they walked out of the building again, the only proof of it even having been brought up in their conversation, being the letter that somehow seemed to weight a full ton more than an envelope with two pieces of paper in it was supposed to weight.

\- 

"Come on racoon man, the door ain't gonna close itself."  
"Wow, for a second there it actually sounded like you willingly wanted to be near me."  
"Shut up, you invited me, so, me holding the door to your damn house doesn't mean anything."  
"Sure it doesn't. I can read the signs."  
"The Hell is that supposed to mean?"  
"You're obviously swooning for me."  
"You wish, dipshit."

Bucky just laughed and pushed past Sam, the door falling shut behind the two who were now left standing in the dark hallway, the ex-assassin quick to turn on the light before taking off his shoes and staring at Sam until he did the same. The shield was left leaning against the shoe rack.

"Tea? Coffee? Vodka?"  
"Just water is fine, thank you."

They walked through a door into the living room and open kitchen, the room flooded by natural lighting coming out of the large windows covering the entire back wall, one of them functioning as a sliding door that led to a large balcony, two chairs and a small table the only things that keeping the cement and glass piece of outside from being completely empty.

The rest of the house was strangely homey, throwing Sam's expectations of a clean and empty house (how funny it would be put aside, the grandma vibe just didn't fit Bucky) out of the window as he looked around, suddenly feeling awkward in this unfamiliar space.

"Your water."  
The words interrupting the sudden silence made him jump, nearly smacking the water out of Bucky's hand -the disaster only prevented by the Winter Soldier catching his wrist with his metal arm.

Surprisingly, he wasn't immediately laughed at by his friend, but rather given a worried look.  
"You okay birdman?"

Sam huffed, pulling his wrist out of Bucky's grasp and taking the water from him, side-eyeing him while he drank it.  
"That better not have been poisoned."  
"I would never-" "Here it comes." "-do that to Steve."  
"And there it is. See, here I was thinking you might actually like me."  
"You keep on dreaming pal."

With both of them wearing a shit-eating grin, Sam followed Bucky into the kitchen, silently inviting him to stay over as he pulled out two plates and looked at him, Sam simply nodding to confirm that he'd like to before the two plates were sat on the table and Bucky opened the fridge to see what he could make.

"No offence Winter, but if your cooking is as bad as Steve's, I'd much prefer it if I did this while you go set the table or something."  
"Watch it prick, I always cooked for us back in Brooklyn so I'd say it's pretty good. Steve liked it anyway."  
"Yeah well, Steve also likes the bland ass food he makes himself so..."  
"Just shut up and chop the damn unions, Sam."  
"Wow, I finally upgraded from asshole to my first name, today's a special day."  
"I hate you so much, you know that?"  
"Love you too, sugarplum."  
"Oh my god, I'm gonna puke."

They worked in a comfortable mix of silence and throwing insults at each other until a steaming tray of lasagne was set on the table, Sam surprised at how good it tasted, more often than not shoving a fork full of it into his mouth while it was still too hot, resulting in his tongue being painfully numb once their plates were empty.

"Ugh, I think my tongue has a blister on it."  
"Shouldn't have eaten it so fast then."  
"Yeah, no shit Smartass."  
"You flatter me, Sam, a few hours ago you said I didn't have brain cells and now you're calling me smart? you're too kind."  
"I will actually shoot you, Buck. Jesus Christ."  
"See, you keep making those threats, and yet you are here eating dinner with me."  
"You're making it sound like it's a date."  
"Isn't it?"  
"You're impossible."

Bucky gave him a grin that simply begged for Sam to punch it off, while said man simply let go of an incredibly deep breath before stacking their plates on top of each other and bringing them to the kitchen to put in the dishwasher (did Bucky have a dishwasher?).

The other got up just seconds after, taking the plates from him with a (genuine for once) smile and opening a cabinet to reveal that he indeed had a dishwasher. Sam standing beside him awkwardly as he glanced outside, watching how the sky had turned nearly black as he realised just how late it had gotten.  
God he still needed to get all the way back to his own house which was roughly two hours away if he took the wings, three if he went by car.

"Hey man, I better get going if I want to still catch some shut-eye. Dinner was great n stuff. You're still an asshole but the good kind of asshole... You know what I mean."

Bucky looked up after closing the dishwasher again, seemingly only noticing now how late it had gotten aswell before he eyed Sam, giving him an unimpressed look.

"It'd be incredibly rude of me to let my date -" "I take it back, you're still an asshole." "-get home in the dark... Also, Steve would ask the shield back if I'd let you go home at 12 without asking if you want to crash here for tonight so, You wanna crash here for tonight?"  
"I'm not sharing a bed with you Barnes. That's taking the date joke a little too far."  
"I got an insanely comfortable couch don't you worry. The no-homo rule is still in action. And if you wanna sleep on a bed then I'll just sleep on the couch, no big deal."  
"You seriously want the dick that curses you out the entire time to sleep in your house?"  
"Won't be that much of a change from when Stevie used to live with me."  
"The 'all American kid-friendly hero' gig really isn't for him is it?"  
"nope."

Sam nodded at that, with that simple motion agreeing on staying for the night and at the same time sending Bucky of to make some popcorn and get some chips for them to eat while muttering about how Sam should pick a movie.

The popcorn was left nearly untouched because half an hour on sitting on that absolutely glorious couch (who has a 5000 dollar couch which is worth every single dollar when you sink into the leather so deep you swear you could drown in it? Bucky. the answer to that question is Bucky.) and Sam was out like a light, Bucky resisting the urge to draw a dick on his face before getting up, laying his friend down properly and throwing one of the small blankets, that normally hung over the back of the couch, over him before staggering off to bed himself, a whispered 'goodnight punk.' being the last thing that was disturbing the silence before the door to his bedroom closed shut and it was silent.

\- 

The apartment was cold, like cold cold, as Sam woke up, quickly curling up under the insanely warm but laughably small blanket that was covering him as he tried to focus his gaze, his foggy mind finally catching up on him to realise that no, he hadn't been kidnapped by the nicest kidnappers ever, but he was in fact in Bucky Barnes home, the man of the hour himself standing in the kitchen as he busied himself with making coffee.

Sam got up slowly, wrapping his arms around himself as he wished for his jacket that was still hanging on the coat rack and walked over to the counter, Bucky offering him a mug with a little Captain America shield on it -an eye roll from Sam as response as Bucky showed him his own mug which had a little Bucky cartoon figure on it- and nodded as to silently tell him that this time there wouldn't be salt instead of sugar in it.

"So, why the hell are you in here wearing a t-shirt while it's like minus 100 degrees."  
"They kept me in Syberia remember, the cold doesn't do shit for me anymore."  
"Hmm. fair."

He took a long sip of the coffee, humming in delight as he noticed how exactly the right amount of sugar had been added, and watching Bucky closely as he walked around the counter to give him his breakfast.

He nearly choked on his next sip as Bucky walked around it fully and he realised the Winter Soldier was in only his boxers (briefs, might I add) and the white t-shirt.

Bucky simply laughed and patted him on the back as Sam tried to wipe the coffee away that had gone up into his nose.

"What was that about the no-homo rule?"  
"It's my house you dick, I can wear whatever the fuck I want. Besides, you should be happy that I put this on, I normally sleep naked."  
"You didn't- didn't have to tell me that you know."  
"I know, I know. But where's the fun in that."  
"You're going to kill me one day, you know that?"  
"I always hoped I'd be the one to do that."  
"I- 'm done. Jesus Christ."

Sam threw his hands up, Bucky smirking as he swayed his hips on the way back to his own stool, coffee nearly spilling at the movement, making him curse and wrap both hands around the cup protectively, though he overestimated the strength of his metal arm and the cup was crushed in his hands, coffee spilling over his fingers and on the floor.

"Shit, you okay man?"  
"Yeah, yeah I'm fine. I'm fine don't worry."

Though as he turned around, his flesh hand had a large gash in it and blood was mixing with the coffee that was still dripping down his fingers.

"Fuck. Okay, you sit your ass down and tell me where you keep your first aid kit."  
"Sam, it's nothing I've had worse-"  
"None of that bullshit, you're bleeding and I know how to fix that so I'm gonna, where is the first aid kit?"  
"Sam, you really don't-"  
"First aid kit Barnes, now."  
"... the cupboard on your left."

Sam nodded, watching Bucky closely until he sat down and getting the first aid kit out of the cupboard before making sure the wound was clean and wrapping it up, giving the wrapped up hand a kiss before he got up and escaped Bucky's fake punch, the gagging sounds the ex-assassin made, making them both laugh.

"Thanks. You're still an asshole yaknow."  
"Love you too, you dick."  
"Birdbrains."  
"Punk... seriously though, thank you."

"Any time, James. As long as you get me some bigger blankets, dude sized, not the baby sized shit you got laying around."  
"It's my house man."  
"And your couch is my new second bed, so you better get me some damn dude sized blankets."  
"You're impossible, you know that?"  
"Shut up, you love me for it."  
"Yeah, I do."  
"Yeah, you do."


End file.
